Navigating change & finding balance between the old and the new
I am currently living a life-altering change. A change which means moving, stepping into something completely new. An exciting change. A change that has been long awaited;
Like a butterfly in a cocoon, I have silently followed the moving masses of energy, strands being pulled and pushed, waiting for everything to align.
Once everything shifted into place, old ties fulfilled, new ones emerged and life altered, I felt a freeing relief in my whole body. Finally able to spread my wings, I enjoy the air carrying me towards a new adventure.
It is as if life is back on track. I am back to myself, different, but strongly rooted to all that sustains life within. All that has ever sustained life within.
Things evolve with ease, practical matters effortlessly come together, there is no hesitation, no doubt, just a strong spring carrying me forth. Forth to something new and unknown.
The change feels good, freeing, intended and magical. Everything is as it is meant to be, and I am at home even in the unknown.
Change does not always come like this. It is rare to have space and time to watch it form, to have time to prepare for it before it has even begun.
Our ever-changing lives
Sometimes change is so sudden it rips us away from life, from ourselves. Sometimes it leaves us raw and sore. On occasion it never comes, not as we expected or envisioned.
But change is always there. Here. Present every day. Change allows life, allows growth, and without it, we would cease to exist.
Living through big changes, especially the ones that permanently alter the course of one's life, is an emotional rollercoaster. You are faced with choosing between the old and the familiar and the new and unknown.
And once you choose the new there is no turning back, you commence the internal transformation from cocoon to butterfly. You say goodbye. Shed the old. You crack and break like the bark on a tree to create room for new life to unfold.
Unknowing of what lies ahead you encounter fear, you nervously weigh every step, until the very last moment you wonder if it was the right path after all.
It is. It was. You can feel it in your whole being. Beneath the uncertainty and the lure of the safe and familiar, you know. You always know.
You know because change is not solely uncertainty and fear. It is also joy and excitement, your senses grow and sharpen, you feel more alive. Alive with a lust for life.
At the same time, you grieve. You grieve all you have to let go of, all that will never be again. Because you know that even if you return, things will not be the same – you will not be the same.
Once you expand, once your life expands, it will never again fit the shape it once was.
Finding peace in the constant flux
Change, stepping into a new life, is an emotional rollercoaster. For a moment you are suspended in time, your body swelling with emotions that are difficult to contain and hard to understand.
In these moments, when you can feel all life course within you and do not know how to contain all that is, presence comes as an aid. Slowing down, focusing on one moment at a time, taking things one task, one step, one breath at a time, grounds you.
Grounds you and relieves you from the stern grip of the past and the future, of all the questions and doubts. Of all the unknowns.
Here. Here and now is life. And here, here and now you are allowed to feel all you feel, to jump from one end of the emotional range to the other, from a high to a low at a moment’s notice.
Here. Here you realize the multitudes you contain, how immense you are, how much life you hold in your precious body, your eternal being.
And only from here can you move forward, knowing that whatever comes, whatever you will have to face, you are whole, alive, radiant and rooted in yourself.
Rooted in the you, you are here and now, dancing to the beat of your heart, gently, openly surfing the waves of change.
Some days you drown. Others you fly. And you learn that you know how to return, come back, here, to the you that is alive and true today.
The only way through change – life and the adventure it is – is to live it. One moment at a time. Heart open. Gently breathing life into each moment. Allowing the multitudes we contain, allowing life to pass through us as we pass through it.